Breeisms - The First 2008 Installment

Okay, if you read my blog very often you know that the "Breeisms" posts are a regular feature. And as you know, these are collections of funny one-liners or short stories of Brianna's day in compilation form. Sort of like the cliff's notes on Bree's funny antics that probably otherwise wouldn't really make a whole blog entry on their own. Well, I suppose "back in the day" of my early blogging I would have made them each their own one paragraph entry, but then, that was back when I used to post every day, sometimes multiple posts a day even. (I've had people say to me, "Gee, I just don't know where you find the time to do all those blog entries!" But you know, the whole writing thing is my creative outlet. It's my thing to blow off steam and relax. You may take a bubble bath or play Nintendo instead, I blog.) Having many shorter posts was also before the whole having two children scenario. So, some time back I started making note of some of the silly stuff Bree does and when I'd gathered up a handful then I'd do a post. And I started regularly calling those entries "Breeisms." And, okay I admit what you've probably already suspected...I sort of like coming up with interesting little titles for my blog posts, not having the same name for any of them, etc. So at first when I kept calling them "Breeisms" I felt kind of out of character about it and felt the need to title entries like this, "More Breeisms" or "Even More Breeisms" maybe "Another Round of Breeisms" "Again with the Breeisms" and even "Yes Breeisms, Again!" But now I'm giving up on feeling the need to qualify the title and shall now henceforth and forevermore simply call these little collections of amusing anecdotes about my daughter plain old "Breeisms." I'm embracing the fact that it's a thing on my blog, so yes, you may see several entries in the same month entitled "Breeisms," although I reserve the creative license to add to that title as I so feel. (Uh because in case you haven't noticed I can get just a wee bit wordy, just sometimes. Take this very long and fairly unnecessary intro for example, or the fact that I just substituted the words "creative license" to take the place of "right" in the last sentence there.) So there you have it, my declaration of independence from feeling the need to come up with creative titles for "Breeisms." (Just wondering here, did you notice I managed to say "Breeisms" 11, oops nope 12 times just there? Oh and that I can go on at great length about pretty much nuthin'? It's a talent...)

Well anyways, without any more verbal wanderings and without further ado here it is - your official first installment of .... well you know what they are by now. (And there are quite a few, it's been about a month since the last ones and they've been adding up.)

• answering the phone - is Bree's new favorite hobby. When the phone rings at our house the race is on! It's a mad scramble! Brianna will yell "I'll get it!" and start running towards the phone eagerly which in turn prompts me to dash around trying to find it, somehow the darn thing is always in a weird place. She wants to feel like a big girl by answering the phone I guess, sometimes she even cries if I beat her to it. And I really don't want her to answer our phone, she says embarassing things - take the time it was MY PASTOR on the phone and before I could pry it out of her hand Bree managed to answer and say, "Hi! I'm Branna! I pooped this morning! Who're you?"
  

• sweet Santa - Bree got a candy cane in her stocking for Christmas which she was pretty happy with. She told me, "Mom, Santa brought me a candy cane! How sweet of him!"
  

• Captain Cat and Dr. Mommy - just a few of the alias names Bree refers to herself and me by. Yes, her imaginary life continues to be quite rich. Sometimes she's Captain Cat and sometimes I even get to be Dr. Mommy and then it's my job to hold down her pet animals while she gives them a checkup. They usually ALL need shots as well but she gives them band-aids and suckers afterwards so....
  

• broken arms and legs - something my drama queen claims to get quite often these days. Anytime she hurts herself, "Mom, I broke my leg!" Or even worse, one time when she was being stubborn and I grabbed her by the hand and marched her to me she said indignantly, "Mom, you just broke my hand!"
  

• Happy Meal! - apparently a strong force in Bree's little life. Like most kids, she loves to get her occasional Happy Meal, it's quite a little treat for her. The last time we got her one it was on a hectic day, when it had gotten to be later than we normally eat. Bree had skipped her nap and was pretty tired so she actually fell asleep on the couch while Trav was out grabbing our McDonalds at the drive-thru. Trav walked in the door, walked up to Ms. Sleeping Beauty, laid a hand on her shoulder and said very quietly to her, "Wake up Brianna. Your happy meal is here." To which she instantly bolted awake, launched herself standing and said, "HAPPY MEAL!" It was hysterical!
  

• When you were a little kid/when I grow up - Some of Bree's favorite topics lately. "Mom, when you were a little kid what kind of toys were in your Happy Meal?" "Mom, when I grow up I'm gonna drink coffee and drive and eat hot peppers!"
  

• Bare Necessities song - Brianna loves to sing, it's just that she doesn't catch all of the words sometimes. And so, like her father, she just tends to make them up in that case. Well, she got the Jungle Book movie for Christmas and has already been singing the Bare Necessities song. Only, in her world it goes like this "...Bare athethitees, the simple bare athethitees, forget about your worries and your toes!" (Because what 3 year old is gonna remember the word that goes there is strife!)
  

• I don't love it - Well, it's official, everyone's a critic. You see, we have a big glass window in our back door, which is great and all except for the fact that we don't have a fence and our neighborhood is still under construction. So, call me a prude but I feel weird thinking that random construction guys could be seeing into my house, especially considering that there are plenty of days I never manage to get dressed and spend all day in my PJ's. I had a curtain up for awhile but it blocked a lot of light so instead I decided to give it a frosted look. After Bree noticed what I was doing she walked up and said, "Mom, I don't love it. I don't love what you're doing. How will I see Daddy cook?" (His grill is on the patio.) Funny thing is, she said the same thing when I decided to take some clutter off the counter and put our toaster in the cupboard..."Mom, I don't love that." Maybe she's resistant to change, or just opinionated! :)